How to Speak Troll

For those scholars who study rare languages, Game Masters who want an enhanced level of authenticity in their games, or anyone interested in frightening your neighbors, here are a few tips for speaking Troll:

Spoken Troll sounds vaguely like the common tongue, just pronounced with a slack jaw and either a “Hissssss!” or “Gah!” between most words.

All sentences are only three words. And scramble the order.

Never make eye contact. Stare at your subject’s shoulder as if you want to take a bite of it. Use a lot of threatening hand gestures.

Practice a few hundred times in the mirror, and before you know it, you’ll be acting just like a Troll. Or get arrested.